this is me
(or midnight biological autobiography on may23/03)
originally written 05.23.03

this is me
collectively
in entirity
completely me
is what you see
that's what you get
you won't forget
you see my sweat,
anger, tears, smile,
pain--every single mile
all the while
i hold nothing back,
no lack of reality.
i am your three-sixty view
that zooms out and through
nothing to hide
nothing inside
everything out
in the clear
i am here
in front of the live studio audience
in dolby surround sterio audio
high-definition quality
all of me
love it or leave it
you better believe it
this is my soul
this is my all
this is my every-little piece
this is my lack of inner-peace
this is my inner-rage
that came with age
this is my invisible dad
the male influence i never had.
this is my insecurity
looking for a cure in me
is there any curin' me?
--well is there?
this is the other side of me,
the secret suicide in me,
the other side you never see,
the side that you're too scared to see.
the sensitive romantic
with the lovey-dovey antics
the things that he cannot supress
this is me: no more, no less.
this is me.
look at me.
this is me.
make no mistake.
this is me.
the man, no myth.
this is me.
love me or hate me.
this is me.
you will know me.
this
is
me.

easy
originally written 05.01.03

is it as easy as
changing my shirt
with every rise of
the gleaming dawn?
my peaceful slumber
is brought to a halt
by a single burning question:
who do you want to be?

everyday, every moment
you are undeniably
you...but
who you are is just as deniable.
every fraction of every second
is an opportunity
to be reborn
physically, spiritually, mentally.

if i so choose
i could be the person
sitting next to me next week.
i could be the guy
standing behind me tomorrow.
i could be the girl
kneeling before me this coming second.
i will be me in any case.

i'm the guy. you're the girl.
originally written apr.03

i'm the guy that you see in the crowd
the one who does not really fit in
the one that is dying to be noticed
dying to be noticed by you.

you're the girl who could save me from this life
the girl who could save me from me
the girl who is not like the others
while the other want to be just like you.

i'm the guy who is struggling to not drown
and fade away into the background
and blend with the painful plain backdrop
but that's where i've been headed lately.

you're the girl who writes the private poems
words that the world won't see
you don't think they'd understand
that's what you've been feeling lately.